YOU FAT BASTARD!

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A website for fat bastards everywhere
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ARE YOU A FAT BASTARD?
If your six pack as long since been replaced by a one pack, your tits have become bigger than your wife's...
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THE ADVANTAGES OF BEING A FAT BASTARD
You can spew up your ring in a pub without being embarrassed about it as this this sort of behaviour is more or less expected of you...
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HOW TO BECOME A FAT BASTARD
BECOME A MEMBER OF PARLIAMENT
You can get really fat on all those lovely expenses our MPs will still find a way of claiming for themselves...
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FAT BASTARD ACCESSORIES
A genuine fat bastard will need several accessories if he is to look the part. Any, but preferably all, of the following...
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FAT BASTARDS TOP FOODS
1. Meat Pies
2. Pizzas
3. Fry-ups... more...

DEAR PORKY'S ADVICE COLUMN
Dear Porky I am fat (over twenty stones and only five feet six) but I am not a fat bastard as I am not a bastard. In fact I ...
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DIETARY ADVICE
To maintain an unhealthy weight is simply a matter of continuing to eat the unhealthy diet that made you a fat bastard in the first place...
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FAT BASTARD OF THE MONTH
A fat bastard will be selected every month from nominations suggested by fat bastards and friends of fat bastards...
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FAT BASTARD POLITICIAN OF THE MONTH
A fat bastard politician will be selected every month from nominations suggested by disgruntled fat bastards and anyone...
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FAT BASTARD CELEBRITY OF THE MONTH
A fat bastard celebrity will be selected every month from nominations suggested by celebrity worshiping bastards and anyone...
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TOP TEN FAT BASTARD BANDS
1. Meatlolaf
2. Bread
3. Feeder... more...

FAT BASTARD ENHANCEMENT
Other than eating more there are a number of ways you can make your stomach more satisfyingly grotesque...
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FAT BASTARDS ANONYMOUS
In the interests of the above I recently attended a meeting of the Luton branch. There were about twenty people present, all seated in a circle... "
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FEEL GOOD ABOUT BEING A FAT BASTARD
You are helping to keep people in a job. Thousands of workers in the food and drink industry would be thrown out of work if fat bastards...
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FAT BASTARD CHILDREN
Any self-respecting fat bastard will want his son to grow up to be a fat bastard. Babies are usually already comparatively fat when they are born...
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GENERAL ADVICE
It does not pay to listen to people who tell you that you are eating yourself into an early grave. How do they know? How can they...
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RECIPES
PORK PIE
Ingredients - One large packet of Jus Rol pastry. 2 pounds belly pork. Method -Trim all the meat off the belly pork...
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MEAT PIE OF THE MONTH
Here we feature the pie that has found most favour amongst fat bastards...
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FAMOUS HISTORICAL FAT BASTARDS
Sir Winston Leonard Spencer Churchill KG OM CH TD FRS PC FB (Fat Bastard), 30th November 1874 – 24 January ...
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LINKS OF INTEREST TO FAT BASTARDS
The need for lard in a Fat Bastard's diet.
The Fat Bastard's ideal restaurant.
Fashion for Fat Bastards
Wishful thinking for Fat Bastards.
Japanese help toward becoming a Fat Bastard.
Selection of Junk Food.
Amazing big breakfast challenge.