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23 Hillside View
New Mills
HIGH PEAK
SK22 3DF

18th April 1997

Karen Davies
Ferrero UK Ltd
Batchworth Heath House
Batchworth House
Rickmansworth
Herts
WD3 1QB

Dear Karen Davies

Thank you for your letter of 15th April and the jar of Nutella. Yes, I am sure I will enjoy it - the quality of Nutella was never in any doubt, it was just that as your label said 'Hazelnut Chocolate Spread' I not unreasonably expected something with nuts in it. Maybe you should consider making your label a little clearer in this regard?

Now I have some good news for you! I believe you may have accidentally stumbled on a really exciting new advertising slogan for your product. It is contained in the last sentence of your letter. I refer of course to your phrase 'You cannot feel the nuts!' (The exclamation mark is mine). It definitely has a ring to it, that certain je ne sais quoi which all great advertising slogans have, a sort of cross between 'You can't tell Stork from butter' and 'Nuts, whole hazelnuts, Cadburys make 'em and they cover them with chocolate'. If you were to use this slogan in a television commercial I am quite sure the sales of Nutella would hit the roof. Comedy is used to great effect in commercials these days, so might I suggest the following:-

SCENE: A SULTAN'S HAREM.

A EUNUCH IS SPOONING NUTELLA INTO HIS MOUTH DIRECTLY FROM THE JAR, WITH OBVIOUS ENJOYMENT. ONE OF THE SULTAN'S WIVES, SCANTILY-DRESSED IN BRA AND DIAPHANOUS PANTALOONS, IS FONDLING THE EUNUCH IN THE GROIN AREA OF HIS TROUSERS.

THEY BOTH TURN TO THE CAMERA IN UNISON AND SAY: -

"You cannot feel the nuts!"


Or is that a bit too saucy? I look forward to hearing from you with your comments.

Yours faithfully